6 New Personality Disorders Caused by the Internet

Came across an interesting article via @elvin159.  The article talks about how the Internet has evolved some pre-exisiting disorders.  They broke it down to six new disorders and they are as follows:


Online Intermittent Explosive Disorder (a.k.a. The Thin-Skinned Rage-o-holic)

Originally Intermittent Explosive Disorder


IED Guy: Hey guys I made this Photoshop, can I get some constructive criticism?
Normal poster: You might want to cut six or seven of the lens flares.

First, there’s the obvious: Most of us suppress our real-life spurts of rage for fear of getting punched in the face by the person we’re screaming at…That’s probably the weirdest part, that these people who are SCREAMING INSULTS IN ALL CAPS are often at the same time sitting in a cubicle somewhere, sipping coffee and conversing pleasantly with the person next to them.

Low Forum Frustration Tolerance (a.k.a. The Frantic Browser Reloader)

Originally Low Frustration Tolerance


This is the guy who makes a new thread, knowing he’s just written the absolutely perfect post. A post that should be heralded across the Internet for its beauty, comedy and insight. It is such a good post that the guy is checking every five seconds to see if there is a new response. If he gets a response he quickly dashes out his own reply that will appear half a second later.

If there are no responses to his perfect post then he will wait an eternity of five minutes before replying to his own thread with, “What, nobody has a comment? Helloooo???”

There never has been an engine for instant gratification like the Internet. Our parents thought television killed our attention spans, but hell, with TV you still had to wait for the shows to come on, and they played at their own pace. On the Internet, the videos start when you fucking tell them to. If they don’t, off to another site…It trains all of us to be impatient. And it’s easy for the impatient to start looking for more pieces of content…And why wouldn’t we? This is a place where we can get a girl to strip for us on a webcam for like three bucks.

Munchausen by Internet (a.k.a. The Sob Story Teller)

Originally Munchausen Syndrome

These are the people who lurk around innocently enough, and then, one day, tragedy strikes. Their dog, or parent, or maybe a close friend died. Maybe the poster themselves found out they have a terminal disease. You send this person your prayers and well wishes, maybe a few dozen kitten pictures and you hope they will get through it.

Then, a few months later, another tragedy strikes them. Their best friend was raped, or paralyzed in an accident, or both. A few months after that, their father dies. Again.

Soon it becomes apparent that they are either living under an ancient Egyptian curse, or they’re making it all up.

It’s so common that somebody else has already coined the sarcastic term for it: Munchausen by Internet.

A famous case of cyberMuching was that of Kaycee Nicole, a 19-year-old with Leukemia who turned out to have been created by 40-year-old Debbie Swenson. The Kaycee character posted daily for two years in a online journal about her struggle to live with her illness. She then “died” and only when there was no funeral people did people figure out it had all been a hoax.

Online Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder (a.k.a. The Grammar Nazi)

Originally Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder


We all reserve the right to mock people who post 500-word blocks of misspelled nonsense. But then you have the situation where somebody posts a perfectly clear and clever message but within their well-articulated points they dare to confuse “your” with “you’re.” And then somebody will flip the fuck out.

Like a Mossad agent in rural America, you quickly discover that you’ve found a Nazi. Of the Grammar variety.

At the heart of the real-life OCPD sufferer seems to be an irrational fear that the rest of the world is sloppier, dirtier and more disorganized than it should be, that it’s rapidly getting worse, and that the world will fall to pieces unless someone straightens it up.

Low Cyber Self-Esteem (a.k.a. The Guy Who Everyone Hates but Who Never Leaves)

Self-Abasement and/or Attention Seeking Behavior


Each forum, chat room or other online community seems to have a person or people who just don’t fit in. It’s not that they are necessarily horrible people, they’re just the square trying to fit into the triangle hole. They get ridiculed constantly.

Now you may figure this is no different than the picked-on nerd in high school, but unlike that kid always getting squished into a locker, these people are free to leave the website at any time.

But they never do.

So we’ve established that when you say, in person, “Jimmy, go away, you’re a retard” that Jimmy is just happy that somebody used his name and acknowledged his existence. Even if the only reason you used his name was to tell him to go die in a fire.

But when you type it on a message board, it’s that much better. This isn’t just attention, but attention that’s being broadcast around the globe via the World Wide Web. The “we hate Jimmy” thread on a popular forum might be read by thousands of people. If that many people are reading about him, he must matter (hell, think of all the TV personalities who have made a career out of being hated).

The attention-seeker gets what he wants, and the self-abaser gets an erection big enough to actually interfere with the signal on his wireless keyboard.

Internet Asperger’s Syndrome (a.k.a. The Troll)

Originally Asperger’s Syndrome

A kid commits suicide on webcam while the trolls cheer him on, Anonymous mocks a suicide victim, some kids fire a baby out of a giant slingshot for a YouTube video (we’re not sure if that last one actually happened but it’s really just a matter of time).

Normal kids, good grades, no criminal records… but get them in a chat room and suddenly it reads like the transcript to a Charles Manson parole hearing.

In both cases, when the ability to see nonverbal responses and facial expressions goes away, so does empathy. Soon the thing you’re communicating with isn’t a person, they’re just a bunch of words on a screen. A bunch of words that the little bastard didn’t even bother to spellcheck.

Everything is taken straight from a post @ [cracked.com]


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s